


Grovel & Beg ... But I Won't Forgive

by DarkenedHeart



Series: Another Mistake [2]
Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Barry makes a BAD decisions..., Canon Divergence, Gen, Hurt/No Comfort, Mostly Julian POV, Poor Julian!, Post-Episode???, Second-Part, Why am I writing such sad things?, au-ish
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-11
Updated: 2017-03-11
Packaged: 2018-10-02 20:40:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10226876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkenedHeart/pseuds/DarkenedHeart
Summary: A continuation from the previous piece of Canon Divergence.*(I'm not very good at apologizing. I'm much better at pointing the blame.)*..."I'm so mad at Barry for mistreating Julian like that...he should've at least apologized. No he should've groveled at Julian's feet for forcing him into doing that..." [hellsinki]This happens either:1) With Wally NOT being stuck in the speedforce-or-2) After they save Wally & during a time when things are (relatively) okay.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hellsinki](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hellsinki/gifts).



Julian hates. He hates so much it hurts. The reasons for his hate keep rolling through his head like a bad movie.

He was forced into a 'prim and perfect life'; to learn every manner in the book, regardless of his own interests and desires.

He was forced to learn his field of work anew when 'Meta-Humans' came into being; to adapt to a new form of villainy. His accomplishments didn't matter any more. No one cared how many plaques he put onto the wall; not as long as there were people who could control elements walked the earth.

He was forced to learn how to function on his own when his sister died; to learn how to support himself, because there was no one else left to support him. His parents could barely handle themselves, they didn't have the strength to worry about their own son, to care about how he was feeling.

He was forced into servitude by Savitar; to kill and manipulate others. He was made into 'Alchemy' and wrought so much pain to the world. The vile monster most certainly didn't care about what he was doing. He knew his own deplorable plans and readily used whomever he could reach.

Then, finally, perhaps almost most painfully, after he thought he might finally be free from being forced into anything...Barry Allen forced him to be the monster's mouth piece.

The Flash, the hero of Central City.

Such titles were washed away with the filth of the man's actions. Barry Allen didn't deserve his powers. He was no better than the Meta-Humans the police locked away.

A few good deeds could not justify the darker missteps of a mistaken 'hero'.

Julian has half a mind to turn Barry Allen in, to let the entire world know who he really is. Every fiber of his heart wants to do it. To have the speedster locked away before he can force anyone else into anything. He'd be protecting the innocent. There is no doubt in his mind that, if HE thinks it is the right thing, that Barry Allen would use his powers for the wrong thing again.

The more Julian thought about it...The more he knew that he couldn't allow the reign of the 'Scarlet Speedster' to continue.

　

A knock on the door startles Julian out of his disparaging thoughts. He wipes at his face, wet with tears he didn't realize he had shed, and he shuffles to the door to see who it is through the spy hole.

Allen stands on the other side, looking pensive and unsure. Julian steps away from the door as the brunette knocks again, his heart beating rapidly in his chest.

'No. Not again. I can't. I won't.'

Instead of letting the other man in, Julian runs for his gun. He checks the clip, cocks the barrel, and waits for the intrusion he knows is coming.

"Julian?" Allen's voice comes through the door. "I know you're in there. Can we talk?"

Cisco, or perhaps Joe, must have tracked his phone. That, or the 'hero' was lying.

"I'm coming in," Allen warns, then phases through the door.

Julian points his weapon at the man, anger boiling hot in his gut as fear tries to creep up his spine.

"Woah there!" Allen lifts both hands in surrender, his face contorting to shock. "It's me, Julian. You can put the gun down."

"The gun is because it _is_ you, Allen," Julian tells him, hoping the man wasn't too thick to understand his meaning.

"What?" Allen asks, confused. Apparently, Julian was wrong about the man's capability for intelligence. "Julian, please-"

He tries to take a step closer but Julian shouts at him to, "Stay back!"

Allen stops, his eyes widening as his arms slowly lower.

"I'm not going to hurt you," Allen says quietly, sounding hurt over the possibility.

Who was _he_ to sound hurt? Julian did _nothing_ to betray him! _HE_ , Barry Allen, broke all semblance of friendship or human trust possible. He purposely went against kindness and decency, so how _dare_ he appear the victim.

Julian's grip on his gun tightens as he glares at the man invading his home.

"I admired you," he confesses guardedly. "I looked up to you. I thought we were friends."

"We are friends, Julian."

"No we're not!" Julian spits back. He won't allow lies in his own home. He is through being forced into anything anymore! "Regardless of what you think, Barry Allen, friends are not people you can use as you see fit! And that is _EXACTLY_ ," his arms shake with the severity of his words and he tries to pull himself together so he doesn't fall apart. He can't afford to when facing the enemy. Softer and with effort, he finishes, "That is exactly what you did."

"Julian, I'm sorry," Allen says, eyes pleading as he puts a hand to his chest. "I know I messed up, okay? I went too far. What I did to you is unforgiveable."

"Then why are you here?" Julian interrupts. He smiles, but there's no happiness in his tone as he answers for the other man, "You're here to make sure I don't let your little secret out. That's it, isn't it? You're not really here to apologize, Allen, you're just covering your own self after another mistake. That's all your good for; cleaning up your own mess."

"I have lost so many people, Julian," Allen says sadly, both hands now loose fists at his sides. "My mother, my father... I tried to fix everything and instead I made it worse. I-I couldn't handle the thought of losing Iris too."

"The world does not revolve around _you_ , Allen," Julian tells him. He takes a small step closer, his gun unwavering from its target. "Do you honestly think we're here to serve you? Do you think yourself a deity, like Savitar?"

"No," Allen immediately answers. "I'm not like him, Julian. Even after what I did, you should know that!"

"Should I?" Julian returns. "What else _should_ I know, Allen? You run around controlling others. How is that different from Savitar?"

"I don't kill!" the speedster answers, anger rising up into his words.

"Don't you?" Julian asks. "You changed the world by creating Flashpoint. People have died because of it. That is murder. Perhaps in a different sense, but murder all the same."

Allen shakes his head, denial falling from his lips but Julian presses on.

"You manipulate people, Barry Allen!" he says loud enough to be heard of the other man's mumblings. "You took advantage of me. You literally tied me to a chair so that _you_ could have what _you_ wanted. Savitar does the same thing. He _FORCES_ his wants and desires on others."

As the used-to-be-hero looks up to his used-to-be friend, Julian adds the final nail in his coffin.

"As far as I'm concerned...You and he are one and the same."

Allen's face crumbles as he falls to his knees.

"Please, Julian," he begs. "Please. Please forgive me. I'm so sorry. Please."

Julian lowers the gun to point it at Allen's new position.

"I said please to you," he reminds him darkly. "You ignored me."

Allen lowers his eyes to the floor, a final, whispered, "I'm sorry." falling from his lips.

Julian takes a step away.

"Get. Out."

Barry Allen runs.

　

\--- - ---

**Author's Note:**

> **I am legally inclined to state I own nothing.**


End file.
